<xmp> <body> </xmp> The Witch, The Tooth, And The Dragon

Pie And Wallpaper

~Hooblinka Shares A Secret~

Once the sun was properly back in the sky and the birds had eaten their fill and the shadows had found their places again-- everything seemed to be put to rights except Scatcat and Feebles, who moped about after Hooblinka, waiting for her to tell them about THE SECRET.

Going off a little ways by themselves and out of earshot, Scat whispered- "What was she talking about? Is there some SECRET we've let slip, Feebs? Is she angry with us?"

"Ohhh, I don't knooow," whined Feebles. "What I DO know is the way she's smiling and keeping those thin lips closed and sneaking little wicked looks at us, is making me VERY NERVOUS!" he said. "I can't remember doing anything secretive and then blabbing about it-- what about you, Scat?" he asked.

Scatcat had begun to fidget.

He cleared his throat, looked around sheepishly, then blurted, "I ate the last piece of honey and raisin pie!"

"WHAT honey and raisin pie?" asked Feebles.

"The one I baked for your birthday," he answered, with great sadness.

"WHAT BIRTHDAY??" Feebles asked. "I've never mentioned a birthday, so why would you bake me a birthday pie?"

"I... I wanted you to have a birthday. And me too! And HOOBIE... Hoobie most of all! None of us have birthdays, and that just plain stinks," he added, kicking a stone.

"I don't BELIEVE YOU! Oh I believe you baked a pie.... but just so you could eat it all yourself. IN SECRET!! Ah Hah!! Maybe that's why Hoobie's angry! She knows you baked a fine honey pie, then ate it yourself, you selfish GLUTTON TOOTH!" he moaned. "A WONDERFUL BIRTHDAY HONEY AND RAISIN PIE, and you just STUFFED IT IN YOUR MOUTH without one thought to your friends... how horribly selfish! Stuffing yourself that way, you piggish......"

But Feebles was stopped mid-sentence, drowned out by the sound of Hooblinka laughing. She laughed so hard her hat fell off-- but that only made her laugh harder.

Her two friends just stared in dismay, frightened she'd caught the laughing sickness (the one where a person laughs and laughs and rolls and rolls right down to the sea and is never seen again!) --but Hoobie finally collected her wits, wiped her eyes and put her arms around her two friends and said, "Oh, you two squabbling GEESE!"

"It's so much FUN to watch you two bicker! And all because I let slip, on PURPOSE, there was a secret afoot....that someone had spilled the beans. Well, my friends......it's ME!" she said gleefully. "I'm the one who's learned a secret, and I'm the one gets to tell it."

"You... you LIED!" they both shouted at once. "You said you DIDN'T give up secrets, implying that we do!" they complained.

"As do YOU," Hooblinka said. "Scat, you never told me you could bake, but there you were, sneakily baking and then EATING an exceptionally tasty pie."

Scat cast his eyes down, staring at his tooth nubs, kicking dirt.

"And THEN," she continued, "and THEN you ATE it.....and THEN you confessed it all to Feebles here, who's even now still slobbering over it." At that, Hoobie began laughing again and had a hard time stopping herself before she could go on.

Her friends looked very abashed, eyes down, their faces growing red.

"Anyway, what I wanted to tell you is that I discovered something while climbing out of Rusty's eye this time...... I caught a glimpse of his bedroom, and guess what?"

Feebles and Scatcat had grown very interested, their embarrassment forgotten. "What, Hoobie? What about his bedroom?"

"Well just before I slipped out his tear duct in search of that slacker sun... I saw what HE was seeing and it was his bedroom wallpaper..... and guess what?"

Becoming tired of guessing, they both said a bit irritated, "WHAAAAAT???"

"Gentlemen, we're on HIS WALLPAPER! Tooth... dragon... and of course, me, the witch...... we're all there! I think he MADE US UP!"

"NO!!" they both shouted. "Impossible!"

But Hoobie began to tell them her theory, and they listened quite shocked.

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